Monday, November 30, 2009


Be sure to get the wrestling shoes in the picture because, hey guess what, I'm wearing wrestling shoes!

Conway Twitty

Too much is never enough.

Eddie Rabbitt

...Loves a rainy night!

Larry Gatlin

I apologize for the recent fixation with "golden age" country pop stars, but there's nothing that makes my skin crawl's akin to craning ones neck while passing by a car wreck in some bizzarre subliminal hopes of catching a glimpse of something aweful. Perhaps it's the sheer spectacle of it all. The audacious, devil-may-care abandon. The tableau, if you will. We find the same circumstance with the entire pop culture collective at any given point in time, but there is just something uniquely hideous about THESE people at THIS time that seems to make me recoil with shame at being of the same species.
Take, for example, Mr. Larry Gatlin here - The knowing, come-hither gaze. The fingers confidently fixed in the classic psychiatrists bundle that seems to say, "I'm listening". Maybe it's the waist-hugging shirt or the dainty ladies bracelets. Or maybe its the medallion nested in the soft bed of chest hair which, no doubt, is fragranced with Stetson.
Couple all of this with the poetic lyrics-
"I don't wanna cry this early this morning
But cry I will if you go through with leaving me alone
I don't wanna cry this early this morning
So lay back down and love me and leave the leaving to later on" - and you've got a recipe for some of the worst culture the human race has ever chosen to adore.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

The Oak Ridge Boys

The current lineup includes (from left to right) Duane Allen - a lovable long-haul truck driver turned country superstar after a successful audition for Chuck Barris‘ Gong Show. Also rumored to have been the first in show business to have launched the “acid wash” phenomena of 1985. Gandalf the Grey - a bawdy baritone with a penchant for fashion. Seen here sporting a full-length, reversible beaver pelt parka with a crushed velour lining - perfect for cuddling by a fireside with a bottle of port after a long day on the slopes…accommodates two!! Joe Bonsall, John Oats’ (of Hall and Oats fame) slightly sexier half brother who, according to Guinness as of 2003, holds the worlds record for the longest left-half of a mustache. Joe and his husband Garrett currently live in Reseda California with they run a line of military surplus outlets. And finally Richard Sterban - an overnight sensation who took the country by storm with his supporting work as the bass singer for Tanya Tucker. Featured on such memorable MCA favorites as “Here’s Some Love", and "It's a Cowboy-Lovin Night"…Oooom boppa mow mow!
The Oak Ridge Boys have also made a considerable contribution to Broadway with their irreverent interpretation of 'Reconsidering Sandy', a show that first garnered the attention of critics in Alto singer Duane Allens hometown of Flagstaff Arizona and was soon setting stages ablaze from Jonesboro Arkansas to Muncie Indiana. Broadway wig master and talent scout Buzz Shepherd saw 'Sandy' in a whirlwind Akron premier and said, "Where did they get those wigs?...I've died and gone to heaven!" The show was lauded the best of its kind east of the Rockies and west of the Smokeys and was carried to Broadway where it blossomed into the mega hit of the late 80's.
What's next for the lads? Richard Sterban says, "We're just gonna keep riding this wave as long as we can. I mean, whatever keeps the creative juices flowing, ya know?" - We sure do Richard, we sure do!

Thursday, November 26, 2009

dying garden

Sparrow in November sun
sunflower skeleton wizened
and wicket garden gate
a brittle, gray ribcage around
the loam and ground
yellowing leafbed to keep
warm the earth
where nesting seedlings cuddle
beneath watchful eye -
and November sparrow.

High grass tufts
tickling thickets
crickets and locusts silent and still
in pale November chill.
these hem the edges
of my dying garden.
piles of apples, soft and brown
pumpkins puddling into ground
to be tilled
with cabbage paddles
and viney squash tentacles
dill stalks
and whispering corn canes.
the sparrows of November
and a breathing sky
the keepers watch my garden die.

Midwinters deep
is soon to slip
down from foothills
with morning crisp frost
and hard, icey nights and stars
and snows will
still and silence
what was November

And I
am to remember
that gardens die.