Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Tech Corner - Creating Your Own Calendar

Well, it's been some time since Tech Corner made its latest contribution to the technical universe, but we're excited to be back. And today we'll be talking about creating your own, customized desktop calendar. Okay, some materials you'll need to get started are a ruler, a pen and a sheet of paper - any color you like, but lighter colors are usually better.
Place the paper on a hard, flat surface (a table is ideal, but if a table is not available then some sort of hard, flat surface should work.) Take out your ruler and lay it strait on the paper. Begin by drawing a big square on your paper - Now, remember to utilize the straightness of your ruler. After you have created a square, make anywhere from 28 to 31 smaller squares inside of the big square, remembering that they should be arranged in rows of 7...( * I'll explain later).
* The rows of 7 squares represent weeks, with each individual square corresponding to a day.
Begin to number your squares in sequential order. Be sure to begin with 1, not 0. If you begin with 0 you will have messed up. I recommend, from experience, that you practice on a sheet of scratching paper before you commit with ink to your calendar grid.
By now you should have a pretty comely calendar in your hands...But that's not all. Here's where the real magic show begins. You can go absolutely crazy with decorating your calendar how ever you want. Anything from clipping and pasting magazine pictures, adding glitter or sequins, cotton balls, pipe cleaners, pasta...Just about anything you want!! And, for a splash of color, be sure to color your calendar.
In the past, calendar creation was left to the so-called "professionals", but with technology today, heck...just about any dummy can make a calendar. I did :)
Thanks for checking in, and remember - the more you understand, the smarter you are.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Collegiate Words People Like To Use Only Because It Makes Them Feel Smarter

*WARNING - The following list contains terms and content that may be objectionable to some readers. The language is of an extremely audacious nature and should only be read by bearded, elbow-patches-on-my-corduroy-jacket pontificators who hold PhD's in either the Social Sciences(?) or the Liberal Arts(Huh?)...Consider yourself warned.

1) Adjunct - Attached to another but in a subordinate position. Less than. Kind of important, but not really. For example, you would be adjunct to someone who uses the word "adjunct".
2) Syllabus - An arrogant word for "outline" or "list".
3) Cum Laude - Hey, look at me...I can say something in Greek!
4) Alumni - Greek(Arrogant) for 'Graduate'.
5) Curriculum - GREEK AGAIN!!! A pretentious word for 'classes offered'. You see, it would be remiss for one deemed academically superior to simply say, "Welcome to our college. Here is a list of the classes we offer." The idea is to initially demean and belittle, instilling the desire to apply for a $50,000.00 student loan in order to become educated by the people laying down terms like "curriculum" which you will never EVER be able to repay working at Starbucks.
6) Laureate - Another term for someone who is better than others. The higher education system is replete with terms which enable oneself to condescend.
7) Accolades - KoolAid for intellectuals.
8) Baccalaureate - 'Laureate' and then some!
9) Roster - Yet another pretentious word for 'List'. *see 'Syllabus'. This term is often borrowed by "lesser" educators such as, say, Jr. High School teachers (note that 'Roster' is only two syllables).
10) Prof - Abbreviation for 'Professor', which will quickly become quite beneath you when you run in higher academic circles.
11) Salutatorian - Almost the best. You're better than almost everyone else!
12) Valedictorian - A 'Salutatorian' and a bag of chips;)

Thank you for your patronage. Now, if you'll excuse me, I believe I shall retire to the study.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

I Remember This One...

"The Cordoba...Luxurious in its ride."

Gerry Todd "DooDooDoo"

Youtube won't let me embed this video on my blog, so you'll have to copy and paste it in your URL...It's ever so worth it!

Now THATS Entertainment!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

The Man. The Myth. The Legend. And Finally, The Hangover and The Regret.

Mr. Davis Jr. gave us many a laugh and tear. This immortal performance was a triumphant tour-de-force, given before an audience of drunken over 60's in some back-alley nightclub somewhere in East Hollywood. The technical choreography and mesmerizing dancing maneuvers were as "maahvelous" as was his vocal prowess. I think I may have just vomited a little in my mouth.

"Thank you, Alec, and we'd like to have you over for dinner real soon."

From Time to Time He's Still Got It